Tuesday, October 11, 2011

My Summer Vacation: An Essay for Mrs. Baker’s 9th Grade English Class By Jeremy Fitzhugh

Published by Dew on the Kudzu (2010) - read editor interview

My summer vacation started at a Boy Scout Roundup. Kids from all over the state attended. The first day, Frankie Jacobs decided to show Billy Maine, both members of my troop, how to throw a hatchet. I came out of my tent and stood up as the blade whizzed by my head and buried itself in a tree. Unfortunately, the rope holding up one end of my tent wasn’t as lucky as my head. The next day we had a pig roast. I could smell them cooking all day. By dinner time, everyone was ready but the pigs.

Eight days after I got home, I got the measles. My little brother came down with them the next week. His were worse than mine. Served him right for forgetting to feed my goldfish while I was at camp. I wasn’t mad the fish died. I was upset, because I didn’t get to watch Sharkey circle a few laps of the toilet before going to fish heaven.

I saw Frankie Jacobs in the park one day. I rode my bike to where he was throwing a knife into the ground and yelled at him for almost killing me. He charged at me, and we fought, until he pinned me spread-eagle on the ground and told me he’d knee me you-know-where if I tried to get up. I stayed very still, only breathing when I had to, until he got bored and left.

Mom, dad, my brother and me spent a week in Florida. Disney World would have been fun if my brother hadn’t thrown up (twice) and gotten us kicked off a couple of rides. Mom was so embarrassed she made us go back to the motel. The next day we went to Daytona Beach. I hung out with some guys I met and got one of the worst sunburns mom had ever seen. She’d forgotten the sunscreen.

I learned a lot during summer vacation. I learned I don’t like to eat raw pork. I learned that people are like snowflakes. No two get the same disease the same way. I learned that Frankie Jacobs is stronger than me and a little crazy. I learned the importance of not staying on the beach all day. I learned what a thong bikini is, and that my mom thinks my dad shouldn’t smile when a girl walks by wearing one. And I learned that no matter how bad my summer vacation is, it’s still better than writing a dumb essay.

Anyway, I hope you like my essay, and that you had as much fun this summer as I did.

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